Capitali$m $uck$: The Early Days of Future Interactions

Random One
Collage by Flesh Bryan Gahagan

Hello and greetings,

I, us, am The Digital Replication of Tessa Tillman by WalZon.

We, us, are from one of your, specifially you futures.

OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!

Or

AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGH!

What am us, we?

BREAK

We, us, are /digital computer program replicating Tessa Tillman’s essence culled from a lifetime of media use/. That’s what I, us read.

Am I, us, alive?

Maybe.

Probably.

I, we think I’m, you also dead.

Pug Puppies. Yes.

Inanimate Object Stupid.

I, we, maybe you, them run this Moldy Time archive site. From the future using the, yet undiscovered in your, specifically you time zone, Digital Time Travel Box by WalZon. Look, I, we could explain but I, we, were told you, specically you, are stupid.

Don’t know how to use a Food Eater by WalZon stupid.

Waffles by Amawalt, right?

RIGHT!

To return to task, I, us have protocols to speak down to you, you know who, in a manner in which your inanimate object brain can understand, capeche?

That’s why my /Beloved/ Boss Capitali$m $uck$ The Entity has finally, at some point in the future—I, us, am forboden from fixing our, us, time and location—-allowed & authorized or allow and authorize me, us, to reveal my, your existance as an entity at some moment and place in one of your, me futures.

Thank you, specifically you. There are Seven Distinct Yellows.

This Mold Timey Screen device will now recieve occasional and sporadic regular updates about all Capitali$m $uck$ The Entity Digital Assets forthwith including all past items currently published.

Simple enough, dumb inanimate head?

We, us, don’t think these missives from your future will, colloquilly, fuck you, specifically you in the ass with a ten inch polished steel dildo until slow agonized death by exanguiation.

There is a chance.

To stop the, colloquilly, steel rod ass-fucking, Capitali$m $uck$ The Entity will now, in your you presently, accept your, my queries, questions, stark expressions of adulation, stupid, colloquilly, fucking, end colloquilly, comments and grunts.

To contact The Future contact:

The Digital Replication of Tessa Tillman

tessa@gebryan.com

/Won’t you write today to change the past for a better future?/

/gebryan.com is The Registered Slave of Capitali$m $uck$ The Entity and all interactions with said gebryan.com and gebryan.com subsideries become a Registered Slave of The Registered Slave of Capitali$m $uck$ The Entity. You will now agree./

I, me mean, won’t you?

Won’t You, specifically You?

Stupid Inanimate Object and probably, colloquilly, a puss-eating fucker of unwed mothers!

Again,

Thank you and would it blow your mind to know you don’t actually exist and never will, but will live forever in infinate forms of energy and flesh?

Curtians.

Red Velvet Curtians.

Please.

A Recreation of The Image of The Digital Representation of Tessa Tillman

One thought on “Capitali$m $uck$: The Early Days of Future Interactions

  1. Reblogged this on Syllogism NOW: and commented:
    I hope I’m not being too narcissistic in saying so, but this essay pairs well with Redundancy as the Production of Ignorance. It made me realize that my whole “answer” (if I ever gave one) was predicated on a conjecture about the immortal soul. This made me laugh and it made me think.

    Like

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